Preaching text: John 10:11-18
Periodically over the past several months, I’ve been meeting with Alexander and Collin to do their God and Family badges for Scouts. In our last session, Alexander and I looked over the parable of the lost sheep from Matthew. “Why does the shepherd seek the lost sheep?” was one of the questions. One could just have easily asked, pertaining to our lessons today, why does the good shepherd lay down his life for the sheep?
Even those who come to church super-infrequently or are baby Christians in some way should know the answer to this. It’s because of love. The shepherd loves his sheep. And in both these stories the shepherd is a stand-in for God/Christ and the sheep is a stand-in for us humans, it follows that God loves us. Christianity 101. That’s the most basic, most foundational, most elementary, most fundamental teaching of our faith. It’s the very first thing we learn in Church or should be. Everything else comes from it. God loves you. God loves me.
And yet, so often, we struggle to understand or believe it.
Part of that is language. What do we mean by love? That word can mean so many things in English. In the original Greek of the New Testament, they solved this problem somewhat by having three separate words for love. Philia (φιλία) means friendship or fondness. This appears in English in places like the name of the city of Philadelphia (City of brotherly “love”) or calling oneself an audiophile (one who has a “fondness” for music.) Another Greek word for love is eros (érōs), which is romantic or sexual love. This too appears in English when we refer to things of a sexual nature as being erotic. The third word is agape (ἀγάπη), which is often translated as divine love. I feel that definition, although accurate, muddies the waters somewhat. A better way of thinking of it is as “selfless love.”
We understand philia. We understand friendship and affection. We understand eros. We understand romance and sexuality. We do not understand agape because that sort of love is rare between or within humans. It doesn’t happen very often. It’s not something we experience often and, when we do, it often surprises and astounds us.
The reason for that is because we primarily experience love as transactional. We give something and then get something in return. We do this with our friends. We do this with our lovers and spouses. As much as we give, we receive, and it is odd to us to receive something without having given something.
There’s a video that pops up on my Facebook feed periodically and I actually sat down and watched it all the way through this week for the first time. It’s a video of an old rabbi telling a story. He’s with a young man who is eating his meal.
“Why do you eat the fish?” The rabbi asks.The rabbi concludes by saying, “The problem with the world today is that too much of our love is fish love.”
“Because I love fish.” the young man replies.
“You love fish. So that is why you caught, killed, cooked, and ate this fish.” the rabbi retorts skeptically. He pauses then continues. “No, you do not love the fish. You love yourself. You love the way the fish tastes, how it pleases your taste buds. You love how the fish makes you feel. You love what the fish does to you.”
Transactional love is fish love. We love our friends, at least in part, because of how we feel when we with them. We love our spouses, at least in part, because of how we feel when we are with them. We love our families, at least in part, because of how we feel when we are with them. And when we do not feel good around such people, we often have the temptation to create distance between us and them or to break off that relationship altogether. A temptation we sometimes act upon, creating hurt, heartache, and regret.
And that is why we often struggle to understand God’s love. Because we know our sins, our vices, our mistakes, we know these things hurt God. And while we may confess and apologize for them, we always wonder how much pain will God allow me to inflict upon him before he gives up on me. When will I cross the line when he won’t forgive me anymore?
On an intellectual level, we may see that fear as ludicrous. The Scriptures teach that God’s love has no limits and it does not. But, on an emotional level, there’s always that doubt. What if....what if I’m wrong about that? What if God isn’t really that way? What if...what if...what if. After all, no one else loves me that way. Everyone else’s love has limits. Why not God?
This is the gift of the Good Shepherd stories. This is why we have them. To remind us of God’s love, a reminder we need perpetually, but to also show us what that love is like. To give us an example of what it means to have agape for another, truly selfless love. The sheep can do nothing for the shepherd. He gives nothing. He offers nothing. If anything, all the sheep gives is annoyance and irritation: getting lost, wandering off, getting sick, not doing as it’s told. But none of that matters, because the shepherd loves the sheep. Period.
It is said that the true measure of character is how you treat those who can do nothing for you. That is agape and that is how God feels about you. You can give him nothing. He already has everything. But he loves you. You can do nothing for him. And he loves you. There’s no transaction here. There is no fish love here. It’s that simple. God loves you because that’s what God does. You’ve not earned it. You’ve not merited it. You’ve done nothing to obtain it. But you have it and always will.
Patee isn’t the only theater nerd in our congregation. I’ve been a fan of Broadway for a long time, particularly of Andrew Lloyd Webber. Evita is one of my favorite of his works and about 20 years ago now when that musical was made into a film, Webber wrote a new song for the film. It was called “You Must Love Me.” It appears near the end of the story, when Eva Peron, the titular heroine of the story, has (spoilers) been diagnosed with terminal cancer and she can’t figure out why her husband Juan is still always at her side. Why are you here? I can do nothing for you anymore. Oh, it’s because you must love me.
That is agape. That is the love of the Good Shepherd. And that love will be with you forever. Amen.
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